Tag Archives: cleaning

A Relaxed Divorce… Kinda


Nothing about this move has been relaxed in the slightest. My total apartment move was horrendous. When I arrived on Friday the place hadn’t even been cleaned. There was new carpet, but it was laid hastily and already had glue stains on it. My windows had actually been painted shut (and the paint was still drying and began to bubble in the humidity in other places) and refused to open. My doors and vents are painted over and continue to flake. A super rush job. My back door was broken and my front door had obviously been kicked in at one point. All of my sinks leaked (Every. Single. One.) and my condensation valve leaked. My tub spewed water from the hot water knob. Also my upstairs bedroom window has the inside pane separated. This was all I noticed at FIRST, later I realized that my stove sparked and was a fire hazard.

I lost an entire day of moving (They did reimburse me, but that’s besides the point) I have had to hound them and continue to bother them to fix basically anything. Apparently all but one of the maintenance guys is afraid of me. For right now the valve in the condensation line and the window are things that I’m just going to have to live with I’m sure. I’m still waiting on one of the SINKS to be fixed.

Taking care of the tiles from the obvious flood damage in the basement will be another story. I got grout myself and will be handling that this weekend. I was utterly livid. The walkthrough model is always going to be a little nicer, but this one had hard wood floors, an updated basement, a lovely bright bathroom, and the one I got has cheap carpet, old wood panels in the basement, and my bathroom looks like it should be a room in Silent Hill.

But it’s a quiet complex of families and graduate students at a really cheap price. The grounds are lovely and good to walk with my dog. This is important to me, and I can put up with it being run down. Had the model I walked through been more like what I got, I probably wouldn’t even be this upset. However, this was almost like a total bait and switch. Being in Ohio I don’t have too much recourse against them, and really, once the dang sink is fixed I will not have that much to deal with. It’ll do for a few years, till I financially recover from the separation.

My ex burned my temper pretty bad the day after he moved out of state. He called me and had me try to run him through setting up a modem on a system and with equipment I’d never dealt with before. It took me about an hour before I realized that he was typing the internet address in wrong to even get to the main hub for the router. That had just been an annoying thing altogether. There are very few people I can jawjack with on the phone without getting annoyed to begin with. While he, for the most part, is one of them, really, I’m not tech support. He’s also apparently not comprehending the spousal support issue, or how much money that he needs to put in the joint account for bills until the QDRO goes through. I appreciate that he’s keeping in contact about issues, but I feel like I’m holding his hand when I shouldn’t be.

Regardless, I’ve got some good friends coming over on Saturday to help me finish putting my place together and the animals seem to be adjusting okay. Work’s also going very well and understanding of the fact that I needed a mental health day on Monday. I’m also enjoying the fact that I can cook whatever I want and rather proud of the fact that I have food for two weeks off of 49 bucks. I never realized how expensive the ex was to feed. I am trying a system of taking cash out for the week (food, gas, fun) and when it’s gone it’s gone. It’s too early to tell how well it’s working, but my fingers are crossed.

I’m going to also call about my sink/window/valve today. Hopefully something good will happen.




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On clearing space

Recently I graduated from college for the second time. The first time I graduated I turned my unused third bedroom into an office. It was wonderful, but when I returned to college the time for an “office” was gone and I spent most of my “free” time in labs and making electronics work. Thus, my office became a junk room. Today I felt the need to clean it out. The holiday before the start of school will be here soon, the last hurrah for yard sales and I want to get in on the resale of my items.

People tend to talk about cleaning as a purging. They speak as though they are getting rid of a part of them that had been bogging them down. To me, however, this experience has felt like remembering someone else. Someone who I really loved, but didn’t have much time to keep up with recently was in that room and I can’t believe I nearly forgot all about her. I used to be a fairly good artist. I used to write fiction. Piles of old work is in that office and now it has a proper place again.

I felt like I was looking at myself. A young woman, a manager in a large company who was still reeling from a degree in Literature was staring right into me. Me, a woman who is now a biomedical technician and all too happy to be done with school. I found myself again in old works that aren’t that bad, really. Old things that can be polished with my new world view and my more technical edge are sitting on a desk that probably needs replaced in the near future.

I cosplay now too, so that would easily have a place in this office with Old Me. I went through bookshelves and felt like I’d found myself again. A large piece of me that I didn’t have time to visit in that office. While I did get rid of a lot of old books, I sat aside things that I will mail to friends and family, I took down old pictures and cards to put in my memory box, I’m not giving her up again. Old Me and Me are one person again, finally.

What I was looking for, it turned out, was just me.

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