The medicine works like a slow slow ninja. That is about all that I can say about it at this point. For the first three days I felt nothing. No difference in anything. In fact, on day four I hit snooze for an HOUR and was a FULL HALF HOUR late to work. I was told that this could take a full month for me to feel anything, so I dutifully continued. By day five, I started to notice that things were lighter and moving faster. Time felt very fluid to me again, it didn’t jolt and drag. I felt like I was lighter as well, even my bag wasn’t a weight.
The holidays have been stressful, they always are. But they were manageable. Driving two dogs 300 miles, seeing my ex, dealing with family, driving the two dogs back home in a blizzard… it was really fine. No one asked strange questions and I didn’t deal with anyone that I didn’t want to deal with. When I got back home, I managed to wake up on time for work, do my job with ease, and generally at least act like myself again. Yesterday I wrote a poem, today I wrote a scene.
The only problem that I currently have is a generalized anxiety. I’m fairly certain that previous actions (while drunk, whose surprised? Not me) have lost me a friend, so I feel isolated and lonely. I’ve reached out twice, but… I don’t know. Rationally I think that the holidays are playing a role in lack of communication, but my anxiety is really high lately.
My doctor said that I should give it two more weeks. So we’ll see what it is. The good news is that I’m not drinking that much anymore. So hopefully I won’t lose anything else.